The Space Between Stability and Desire

My husband is a wonderful partner. He’s caring, dependable, and everything I thought I wanted in a life companion. We’ve built a solid foundation together—a marriage rooted in respect, trust, and a shared vision for the future. But lately, I’ve felt a shift within myself, a restlessness I can’t quite put into words. And it’s all because of the energy I share with my boss.

There’s something about him that’s impossible to ignore. It’s not just his confidence or the way he commands a room; it’s the way he makes me feel. When he speaks to me, it’s as though the rest of the world fades away. His attention is intense, focused, and electrifying. I’ve caught myself holding my breath during our conversations, captivated by his charisma and the unspoken tension that lingers between us.

This energy, this undeniable connection, has stirred something deep inside me—something raw and unfiltered. It’s made me wonder if there’s a part of me that’s been lying dormant, a part that craves excitement, passion, and the thrill of the unexpected. I never thought I’d find myself questioning my life or my choices, but this pull has made me pause and reflect.

What am I missing? Is it the spark of something new, the thrill of being truly seen, or something within me that I’ve ignored for too long? The guilt is overwhelming, but so is the curiosity. My marriage is steady and secure, yet this electrifying energy with my boss makes me feel alive in a way I can’t explain. And now, I’m left grappling with a question I never thought I’d have to face: What do I truly want?

 

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