My husband cheated on me, and now he’s blaming me for his actions. I’m heartbroken and confused—how could he betray my trust and then turn it around like it’s my fault? It feels like the ground has been ripped out from under me, leaving me lost and disoriented. I keep replaying the moment I found out, the way my stomach dropped and my heart shattered into a million pieces. I never saw it coming. I thought we were happy, or at least I thought we were trying to be.

When I confronted him, I expected remorse, maybe even an apology. Instead, he turned it around on me. He said I’ve been distant, that I haven’t been meeting his needs, that I’ve been too focused on work or the kids or anything but him. As if any of that justifies what he did. As if I’m the one who drove him into someone else’s arms. His words cut deeper than the betrayal itself because they made me question everything—about our relationship, about myself, about my worth.

I’ve spent nights lying awake, staring at the ceiling, wondering if he’s right. Did I neglect him? Did I push him away without realizing it? But even as I ask myself these questions, I know deep down that nothing I did—or didn’t do—could excuse his choice to cheat. He made that decision, not me. And yet, here I am, carrying the weight of his guilt, trying to make sense of a situation that feels impossible to understand.

The hardest part is the loneliness. I feel like I can’t talk to anyone about this because I’m embarrassed, ashamed, and afraid of what they’ll think. Will they blame me too? Will they see me as the woman who couldn’t keep her husband happy? I’ve never felt so small, so invisible, so unworthy of love.

I don’t know what to do next. Part of me wants to fight for our marriage, to try to rebuild what’s been broken. But another part wonders if it’s even worth saving. How can I trust him again? How can I believe anything he says when he’s shown me that his love comes with conditions and excuses?

For now, I’m taking it one day at a time, trying to piece myself back together while I figure out what I want and what I deserve. One thing I know for sure is that I didn’t deserve this. No one does. And no amount of blame-shifting can change the fact that he’s the one who broke our vows, not me.