I never thought I’d be in a situation like this—feeling as though I’m the one who should apologize, the one who should carry the guilt, even though he’s the one who betrayed me. When I found out about my husband’s affair, the shock hit me like a punch to the gut. The betrayal was more than just physical; it was emotional, deep, and far-reaching. But what’s worse than the affair itself is the way he’s made me feel since then.

Instead of expressing remorse for his actions, instead of owning up to the hurt he caused, he’s made it about me. He says I wasn’t there for him enough, that I didn’t show him enough love, enough affection. He tells me I pushed him away by focusing on everything but our relationship. And somehow, through all of this, I find myself carrying the weight of his choices, questioning what I did wrong.

I spent so much time trying to be a good partner—working hard, being supportive, keeping things together. I never once thought I was neglecting him. But now, all I hear is how I failed him, how my actions—or lack thereof—drove him to look elsewhere. I never imagined that after his betrayal, I’d be left wondering if I was the one who should apologize, the one who should try to make things right.

But no matter how much he points the finger at me, I know deep down that cheating is a choice. It’s a betrayal of trust, a conscious decision to break the commitment we made to each other. I didn’t cause this. He did. Yet, here I am, struggling to let go of the guilt he’s placed on me, trying to figure out how to heal from the hurt he caused without losing myself in the process. How did this happen? How did I end up questioning my worth when he’s the one who should be asking for forgiveness?