I tell myself it’s just a passing thought, just admiration, just a fleeting moment of weakness. But the truth is, every time he smiles at me, something inside me crumbles—I’m falling for my husband’s best friend, and it terrifies me.

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. When he first came into our lives, he was simply a friend, an extension of my husband’s world. He was the guy who could always make me laugh, the one who made weekends with my husband feel like an endless adventure. There was nothing more to it than that, at least not in my mind.

But lately, the way he looks at me has changed. His smiles seem different now—like they hold secrets, like they’re meant just for me. The little jokes we used to share now feel like something more. And when his gaze lingers a second too long, when our hands brush ever so slightly, I feel an ache deep inside me. I’m not sure when this shift happened, or when I started looking at him differently. But I can no longer deny it.

I try to tell myself that it’s harmless, that it’s just admiration, just an innocent flirtation. I’ve been married for years, after all. I love my husband, and he’s always been there for me. But the more I fight this, the more intense it becomes. Every time he smiles, every time he touches my arm in passing, my heart races. I feel drawn to him in a way that scares me.

I know what’s at stake. I know the damage this could cause. The guilt overwhelms me, but I can’t seem to stop it. Every moment I spend in his company, every laugh shared between us, makes the line between right and wrong blur even further. I’m terrified that if I let myself fall any deeper, there may be no coming back.