I’ve been married for 10 years. In the beginning, my husband wasn’t the man I had hoped he would be. He treated me poorly, and worst of all, he was unfaithful. But I was young, naïve, and hopeful that love and forgiveness could change things. I convinced myself that his mistakes were temporary, that with time, he would grow, and we would build something lasting. So, I forgave him. I chose to move forward, and together, we created a life—a home, children, and a shared history.
For a while, it felt like the right decision. I buried the pain, believing that love meant enduring, that my sacrifices would one day be rewarded. But as the years passed, something inside me shifted. Around year five or six, resentment began to take root. The hurt I had pushed aside resurfaced, and I could no longer ignore the way his past actions had shaped me. I felt disconnected, unfulfilled, and emotionally distant.
I found myself longing for something more, something I had never truly experienced—passion, excitement, the feeling of being truly desired. Slowly, thoughts of other men crept into my mind. It wasn’t just physical attraction; it was the idea of being seen, appreciated, and valued in a way I never had been. I never set out to betray him, but the desire for something different became impossible to ignore.
I started questioning everything—our marriage, my choices, and whether love was ever really enough.